Be Clutter Free!
5 Steps to Releasing Emotional Clutter
If you imagine that life is a journey we are all on. Some of us have a destination in mind, we have a map and all the equipment and money that we need to get us there. Some of us have no idea where we are going and few resources but we are perfectly content with that, we just want to have an adventure and enjoy the journey.
On our travels we can encounter challenges that slow us down or change our course. Sometimes we let the challenges get us down, they make our journey less enjoyable and sometimes the obstacles stop us altogether, we feel stuck, unable to continue on the journey at all. This is what emotional clutter does to us.
This article is about how we can deal with those challenges and obstacles.
Step One: Identify Your Emotional Clutter
Start a list of your gripes, moans, fears, anxieties, complaints anger, anything that springs to mind. Allow as much time as needed on this and keep adding during the week as other things crop up.
The most important thing to remember here is that the purpose of the exercise is to identify not to immerse yourself in negative emotions, to unearth what’s there so that we can shine a light onto it. So don’t dwell on the negative feelings. If you do get emotional or bogged down, take a breather, go for a walk, a sleep, read, watchtv and come back to the list later on.
It’s important to be honest even if you feel a little uncomfortable. When I did my list there were some feelings that I felt very guilty about.
Step 2: How Would You Like to Feel?
Now comes the juicy bit – the bit that starts to unstuck the vile sludge of negativity. Take each one of your moans in turn and write exactly how you would like it to be and why. Get into the feeling place. Even if the things are in the past or you feel you can’t do anything about them, it doesn’t matter, just identify how you would have liked things to have been. How you would like things to be now. Keep all your language positive, about what you want, not what you don’t want.
It’s important again to be very honest. What do you really want? It does not matter if it seems to be in the realm of fantasy.
This is your Well, What Do I Want? list. Treasure it. You will be adding to it and using it to build more positivity.
You have taken your first steps on your new journey.
Step 3: What ‘Could’ You Do Now?
Go back to your Well, What Do I Want? list. Take each item in turn and ask yourself this question:
In order to fully release my negative feelings and embrace the positive intention that’s here, what could I do next?
It’s important to understand that it doesn’t mean that you ‘have’ to do something it just means that you ‘could’ do it. It’s about opening the possibilities up. About opening the door and shinning the torch in. There is no pressure here, no list of ‘must do’s’
Some of the things that come up will be practical, others emotional. Here are some examples from my list:
- forgive him
- forgive myself
- get a gardener
- enjoy the chocolate
- write a letter
- ask for some advice
All that you need to make sure is that all the possibilities are ones that would make you feel good or better in some way.
It very likely that by now you will have new impetus and resolve to take positive steps. You may have a strong desire to look forwards rather than back. Go with it and enjoy yourself!
Step 4: Time for Action?
Finding ways that we could declutter our emotions is liberating and makes us feel more positive. Taking positive actions is even more powerful.
Which item on your list could you do first?
Which item on your list could be the easiest to do?
Which item on your list could be the most powerful to do?
Take the steps you need to start making yourself feel better.
Step 5: Releasing Unconscious Emotions
This step encourages us to look at the next level of our emotions: the unconscious.
Are there areas where you feel very stuck and nothing seems to create a shift for you?
Becoming an Observer
By becoming the observer of your own feelings you will come to a greater understanding of yourself and be better able to let things go as negative emotions release their grip on you.
I first came across the notion of being an ‘observer’ in Thresholds of the Mind by Bill Harris. Bill calls it, Finding the Witness. The idea is that ….
“part of you observes what is happening even as it happens. When you observe in this way you feel as if you are standing outside yourself and observing how you’re feeling, what you are doing, and how you’re interacting with your environment.”
You learn incredible amounts about yourself by doing this and after a really short space of time you begin to have a greater understanding of your emotions. This gives you choice.
Become an observer. What do you learn?
Learning EFT
Another technique which can really help to clear unconscious blocks is EFT. This stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. This is free for everyone to learn and can be truly miraculous so check it out at: www.emo-free.com. What’s wonderful about this technique is how easy and completely emotionally painless it can be.
One Final Word
There are many professionals that are there to help you release emotional blocks and I would strongly advise that you seek this help if you are struggling on your own.
Psychotherapists
Kineisiologists
Psychologists
Life Coaches
Counsellors
Spiritual Guidance
If you feel you have serious emotional problems start with your GP who will refer you.
Above all, enjoy the journey!
Have a wonderful life: emotional, physical and spiritual.
Clear that clutter and enjoy!!!!